Charlotte weighs five pounds. What you don’t see when she walks across the room is everything she’s carrying. Chronic digestive challenges. Recovery from severe bone infection. A feeding tube. Ongoing chemotherapy for suspected cancer on her tongue. And yet, she walks lightly. She still attempts to groom herself — even when she doesn’t quite manage it. She still curls up beside me at night. She still watches birds through the window like she’s planning strategy.

If you saw her briefly, you might think she’s simply small. You would not know the battle beneath the surface.

That realization has changed the way I look at people. In professional settings, we often interact at surface level. We see titles. Performance metrics. Deliverables. Outcomes. We do not see: The sick parent at home. The financial pressure quietly mounting. The health diagnosis recently delivered. The personal grief carried silently.

We don’t see it — but it’s there.

In the SBA lending world, this is particularly true. Behind every borrower file is a person taking a significant risk. Often leveraging personal assets. Often betting on themselves. Often carrying anxiety about payroll, debt service, and reputation. On paper, it’s a transaction. In reality, it’s someone’s livelihood.

Charlotte has taught me that strength and struggle often coexist invisibly. She does not announce her discomfort. She adapts to it. She continues.

There’s humility in recognizing how limited our perspective is. When someone underperforms, we’re quick to judge. When a business shows volatility, we’re quick to question. When a borrower requests flexibility, we’re quick to scrutinize. And sometimes scrutiny is necessary. But so is empathy. You don’t know what someone is carrying. That doesn’t mean abandoning standards. It means applying them with awareness.

Charlotte’s resilience is not obvious unless you know her history. Likewise, a borrower’s commitment is not always obvious unless you understand their journey.

In both life and business, curiosity should precede judgment. Ask questions. Listen longer. Look deeper.

Charlotte may be five pounds. But she carries more than most realize.

And so do the people you encounter every day.

Lead accordingly.